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Holocaust Broker

from La Tormenta! by Reverend Moon

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lyrics

I'm a holocaust broker, I deal in fear
The world will end within a year
I saw it in the tea leaves perfectly clear
So sign your life away right over here
Sign it over to me
I'm immortal, I'm divine
And only I can save you
If you're tired of singing the pandemic blues
Then give me your shirt, I got a deal for you

Eleven years ago, whenever that was
I shot a kid, just because
That's the sort of thing everybody does
When you're growing up, looking for a buzz
And besides he deflowered my adolescent sister
Not that I cared about her at all
She was just the Queen of the Shopping Mall

I woke well rested one foggy morn
Nineteen years from the day I was born
I drank myself blind and rented some porn
Did everything I could to incur Mamma's scorn
But that didn't satisfy my new-found adult needs
For Lust, Wrath and Greed
So I voted for some guy who made a nice speech
Didn't seem to bright but I liked his teeth

Then I took a little ride out to the coast
Lookin' for the beach that I liked the most
When I arrived I was white as a ghost
When I left I was burnt like toast
Had plenty-a-sand kicked in my face
I formed an opinion of the human race
It molded my psyche like modeling clay
I vowed I'd rule the beach someday

Although I'm immortal, I just might
Die tomorrow or tomorrow night
That's if everything is planned out right
I'll just suddenly drop out of sight
Get a sex change and pose as my own spouse
I've got a million or two in life insurance
When you run from yourself you need good endurance

credits

from La Tormenta!, released May 5, 2005

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Reverend Moon Toronto, Ontario

REV. MOON (Jakob Rehlinger) heralds secular prophecies of the coming ruination.

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